Sunday, January 1, 2012

Happy New Year.  Re-reading last years ‘year in review’ post, I almost feel as though I’ve gone back in  time.  That is, everything that was looking up last year, is a long way away this year.   I didn’t run the 10K, I didn’t represent Canada at the Kettlebell competition.  I didn’t lose that final 50lbs, in fact I put 50lbs back on.  I Guess I should have realized that last year was gonna be a bad year, when I heard about the “doomsday prophecy” that was gonna happen on my birthday.  That’s May 21st  in case you didn’t know.   So, this year I’ve decided to give everyone a Paid holiday on my birthday instead.  (If anyone is reading this from outside Canada.  May 21st is Victoria Day this year.)

    I don’t feel I need to go into again the details about my accident.  All you need to know is that it sucked.  I also know that you don’t know what I went through, just like I don’t know what you’ve gone through.  Last year I was on the cusp of greatness,  this year I look up to see mediocrity.   That sounds like a challenge to me.  New Years Resolutions sound like a challenge as well.  Probably more like goals.  You can only really make one resolution.  So, despite the obvious visual and Facebook clue from last nights status update.   I’ll tell you here for all to see.

    My New Years resolution is:  The Search For Darryl.

      I know what your thinking.   It’s too vague, no oversight or accountability .  It’s a good thing I’m about to explain what it’s all about.   First of all, as noted.  I WILL only drink (read Get Drunk) 3 times this year.  Wrestlemania, my birthday, and Hallowe’en.  Second, on  Dec. 31st I shaved my face to reveal the cherubic beauty that I posses under all that scruff.   The playoff beard starts now.  I will not shave ‘til I lose 50 lbs.  I’m currently 310lbs.   So 260 is the mark.  I also hope to be back up to working fulltime within 6 months.   I hope I can start back at the gym by then as well.   I also don’t want date till June.  If that.  Now if Valentines Day comes around and someone asks me out, I will probably oblige in a gentlemanly fashion.   Basically the long and the short of it is, despite how long I’ve been single, I don’t want my focus to be split this year.  I want to be the man I was destined to be.   As Will Smith says, “No Plan B, it Distracts From Plan A”.   I’ll find someone to love this year.  I just hope his name is Darryl.
      A year ago I considered my self an Athlete.  I wasn’t the only one who noticed.  Much like Brock Lesnar, that athlete retired due to injury.  I’m still in a lot of pain.   I still have all the stress, and worries that I had yesterday.  But, I also realized that in 2010 I was really happy.   For the most part it was due to the fact that I was training towards a goal.  It was because I realized for the first time in a long time that I was in fact an athlete.   I don’t know where that athlete went.  So the search begins.

    There is more about searching for Darryl though.  I realized last year that I had a talent.  That talent was,  I made a guy who never smiles laugh, and a grumpy guy get up dance.   So either I start my own religion, or I find out how best to use this talent.   Stand up comic?  Moviemaker?  Director?   Who knows?  Something along those lines.  I mean I really do enjoy working in the mud, outside all year long.  But I don’t think It’s what I was meant for.  At the very least I’m supposed to be the Emissary of the Prophets.   Inside joke.  Only one will get it.  So basically I need to figure out how to harness that energy.

    I also want to start a journey this year to live self reliantly.  Some prefer to say ‘Off The Grid”.   I think I can live a sustainable life without the need of a grocery store or,  paying for Hydro.   This isn’t actually a 5 year plan exactly.  More like a before I’m 40 plan.  To do this I will Probably need a car, and some land.  That land may not be in Canada.   Then again, it may be out in BC just waiting for me.  So I need to get my ducks in a row this year concerning that.  Much like My Beloved Ottawa Senators,  this is Year 1 of the ’rebuild’.  Quite a few goals this year.  All attainable, all reachable.  So to quote Mr. Barney Stinson.  The Search For Darryl.  “Challenge Accepted”.



  1. I'm probably the "one" who got your joke, lol. When I read your resolution, I was thinking you should have photoshoped the poster, then I realized you kinda did, lol. You'll give everyone a paid holiday huh? I'm still waiting for my cookie you assbutt!


  2. No you only got that it was from DS9. You don't get the rest of the reference. Only one knows that and she already got it